Plaxico Burress, AKA Harris Smith, Claimed Incident Took Place at Applebee's

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Just when you thought this whole Plaxico Burress thing couldn't take another strange twist, it does. Earlier this morning, Will Brinson pointed out that Burress was spotted turning himself in to the proper authorities and walking without a limp -- something that seems quite odd considering he's not only out of the Giants lineup with a hamstring injury, but also just shot himself in the leg.

Even stranger, the New York Post is reporting that soon after Burress shot himself in the leg, he spent a good 90 minutes trying to find a hospital that would, essentially, sweep this whole thing under the rug.

Granted, I'm not a professional athlete who is facing a potential three years in jail for shooting myself in the leg with an unlicensed gun, but my first instinct after shooting myself in the leg wouldn't be, "who's going to sweep this under the rug for me?" but, "holy crap, I just shot myself in the leg, somebody help me!"

But, again, I'm not Plaxico Burress. And, funny thing is, after Burress found a hospital that he deemed worthy of treating his self-inflicted wound, he wasn't Plaxico Burress, either. He was Harris Smith.

If you'll recall, before former-Falcons quarterback Michael Vick was serving time for running a dog-fighting ring, he was going by the name Ron Mexico attempting to cover up, well, a sex scandal of sorts. Since Burress wasn't in a big hurry to get himself checked into a hospital, he probably could have spent some time using his iPhone to look up the Ron Mexico name generator and come up with something a little more exciting than "Harris Smith."

For the record, my Ron Mexico name would be Duff Ukraine. Fellow FanHouse blogger Ryan Wilson, for example, would be Dante Thailand. Burress would be Sam Monaco. Harris Smith would be Kurt Poland. The more you know.

Anyway, if shooting himself in the leg, trying to find a hospital to discreetly treat him (the hospital didn't report the incident to the police, as they are required by law to do, according to the New York Post report) and giving a fake name wasn't enough for you, Smith, er, Burress, then told the hospital workers that the incident took place at an Applebee's restaurant.

For some reason, I'm guessing we still haven't heard the last of this.

(H/T PFT)

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)

12-01-2008 @ 1:24PM

soulcitysigma1914 said...

Adam, as a former newspaper reporter I gotta tell you you'd be surprised by what people's first instincts are when they get shot. doing things like spending hours searching for a certain hospital or taking the time to get a revenge shot in or leave town in a hurry also tend to happen when people get shot. that part of plax's story is actually not uncommon

12-01-2008 @ 2:56PM

Cheddar Bob said...

Can we start calling Burress CHEDDAR BOB from the movie 8 MILE????

12-01-2008 @ 3:25PM

gmen4evar said...

Oddly enough I am Gunther Chad.

12-01-2008 @ 4:46PM

Taylor said...

To much money..not enough brains

12-01-2008 @ 5:41PM

john delisa said...

POOR PLAX WHAT NEXT ??

12-01-2008 @ 6:52PM

John Marshall said...

Between this bastard and Stephan Marbury I have officially concluded my 50-year tenue as a pro sports fan. God bless Michael Blomberg!!! Throw the book at him.

12-01-2008 @ 8:11PM

Sports Fan said...

How much bling and cash do you need at Applebys? How can anybody in the NYC area NOT know who he is?

12-01-2008 @ 8:45PM

Lance said...

Its sad that the hospital workers that failed to notify the police of this bumbling nimrods accident will be punished far more harshly than "plaxman". He'll return to a team, get paid his millions, and the staff will probably be unemployed. As I see it, it just doesnt pay to be a giants fan.

12-01-2008 @ 8:47PM

What a shame. What a shame that the hospital workers will be punished far worse than "plaxman". He will be on the field next year....getting paid no less, while the workers will probably be dismissed from thier jobs.........justice at its best

12-01-2008 @ 9:05PM

Goes to show, in this economy only the rich must be able to afford the fine cuisine at applbees. Then again maybe Plax loveeeeessssss him some ribs...........weeeeeeedogggie

12-01-2008 @ 10:18PM

stan said...

They call me...Duke Zanzibar.....

12-01-2008 @ 10:46PM

geo said...

some people dont know how good they really have it theres no excuse for it and he knows it send him packing the bum see what its like to have to work for a living

ralphgmiami said...

Just what we'll need now with this publicity. Now all the thugs and gangsters will want to go to Applebee's. I'm going back to dining out for fine dining at Dan Marino's or Mozart-Stube here in Miami. At least they won't play gangster rap at either one. Mozart-Stube plays classical music in the background so I doubt those culture ignorant gangsters will ever want to dine there.

12-01-2008 @ 10:51PM

Soul city sigma1914, it sounds like this Plaxico Burress is not the brightest apple in the bushel. First he takes all that time to think up a name and can only come up with two last names, Harris Smith. He really can't go back for a revenge shot since he shot himself. Maybe he took his time because he was thinking up an alibi for the cops. He can say that he didn't shoot himself that "the gun did it!" despite gun fanatics that say "guns don't kill people" but people kill people. He can also use the excuse that he took a gun into applebee's because the meat on his plate wasn't properly killed.

12-01-2008 @ 10:59PM

Jim said...

What a Freakin IDIOT

12-01-2008 @ 11:28PM

agee said...

i go by the name plax burress

12-02-2008 @ 12:23AM

What a Dumb-ass! Just because he has money they better put his butt in the slammer. I'm tired of all these jerks with their big money lawyers getting them off. He needs to get nailed for 7 years, both charges. Then the Giants need to take all their money back. I'll go to N.Y. when he gets out just to here him ask if I want fries to go with that burger. lmfao

12-02-2008 @ 1:20AM

BP said...

But for the grace of God, anyone of us young gifted and famous millionaires could have accidentally shot ourselves at a popular nightspot.

Boris Peru

12-02-2008 @ 2:28AM

Nelson said...

What are people so mad about? I eat at Applebees all the time. I'm impressed that he knows there is an Applebees.

I wonder what he's ever eaten at Applebees. How often has he been there? What does he eat there usually? I don't like their bar actually. The TV sets are too small. But the food looks pretty good.

I'm going to start going there again, just because he mentioned them. I'm not a fan of his, but it makes me feel connected with the NFL now, to hang out there.

Applebees sounds cool now.