Studs and Duds, Week One: Michael Turner Is Pretty Good

Each week in the NFL, there are players that impress and players that distress. One week a certain quarterback might toss four touchdowns and run around with his finger in the air while the next he's laying on his back, holding his face-mask as the other team returns one of his three interceptions for the game-winning score. With that in mind, here's our new feature, Studs and Duds:

Here's Week 1 at a glance, where we point out the horses destined for the Kentucky Derby and jeer those headed to the glue factory.

Studs

Michael Turner, RB ATL (220 yards, 2 TDs): I guess this would be one way to introduce yourself as a starter. On a new coast that is as far from the initials "LDT" as possible, Turner ran all over a Detroit Lions defense that would have been out-hustled by a Madame Tussuad's exhibition. Breaking one for 66 yards, Turner looked like the second coming of the Dirty Bird in Atlanta.

LaMarr Woodley, OLB PIT (2 tackles, 1 sack, 1 fumble recovery, 1 interception): I guess it would be fair to give this award to the entire Steelers defense, but the second-year man out of Michigan sure had a pretty salty line. A funny fact about Lamarr -- while at Michigan, T-shirts were sold that said, "Guns don't kill people, LaMarr Woodley kills people." The Houston Texans will testify to that.

Donovan McNabb, QB PHI (21-33, 361 yards, 3 TDs): Hey, would you lookie there, Donovan McNabb is having a hot start to the season! The Eagles absolutely dismantled St. Louis 38-3, thanks in large part to McNabb and his ability to spread the ball around to different receivers (three wide-outs had over 100 yards receiving). If the MVP was named after the first week, McNabb would have trophy case manufacturers pounding on his door.

"Hole in the Wall" TV Show, FOX -- I've decided that whoever came up with the new reality show "Hole in the Wall" has definitely smoked or drank too many different things at the same time, but man, does that look fun? If this was an option of something to do at a birthday party, how long would a group of guys stand around attempting to jump through random shapes as they come at you?

Duds

Carson Palmer, QB CIN (10-25, 99 yards, 1 INT) Hey, remember those days when Palmer was the up-and-coming quarterback out of USC that made consecutive Pro Bowls in '05 and '06? Yeah, well since then the iPhone has made life way more convenient and the Bengals have decided to suck. Palmer was outperformed by a rookie quarterback named Joe Flacco in the 17-10 lose to the Ravens in what looks to be another long season in Cincinnati.

Matt Millen, President and CEO, Det -- He is the guy that runs the Lions. Moving on ...

Ted Ginn Jr., WR MIA (2 Rec, 17 yards): You know how everyone was talking before the season about how Ginn might be a sleeper, and it was such a big deal that he went three rounds too early in your fantasy league? Yeah, I guess most of us forgot he played for the Dolphins, where Chad Pennington is, by far, your best option at quarterback. The only successful thing he did all day was pull off a perfect offensive pass interference move in the end zone as Darrelle Revis picked off the last-chance heave.



The Rest of Our Week: Hey, did you hear Tom Brady might be out for the season with a torn ACL? Oh, you did ... 400 times ... in the last hour ... from 35 different people that don't even follow football? I do find it slightly ironic that Brady was on the injury report for 56 straight weeks, only to be taken off before this game, where he then gets crushed in the leg and gives everyone in Boston another reason to drink. Hey Pats fans, do you guys have Chris Simms fever???

Who just missed out?

Almost Studly -- Willie Parker, Cortland Finnegan, Drew Brees and Anthony Fasano.

Almost Dudly -- Titans recievers, the AFC's "Best" Teams, and the St. Louis Rams everything.