Brandon Marshall After Hurting His Right Arm: 'I'm Still Wiping My Butt With My Left Hand'

Denver Broncos wide receiver Brandon Marshall is recovering from a bizarre injury in which he slipped and fell in his home and put his arm through his TV screen. Marshall severed an artery and a vein, damaged a nerve in his right forearm, cut tendons to five muscles and needed surgery to patch everything up.

Marshall now says he's almost fully healed, but in providing that reassurance, he provided way too much information:

"I can do everything with my right hand that I was doing before the accident but I'm still wiping my butt with my left hand," Marshall said. "It's not as strong. My right hand is not as strong."

I really have no idea why Marshall, who lied to the team about how the injury happened in the first place, now feels the need to tell the whole truth about exactly where he is in his recovery. A simple "I can do almost everything with my right hand" would have been fine.