Lance Briggs, Certifiably Insane, Is Unhappy With the Contract He Signed Last Month

Lance Briggs is, simply, bonkers. And this is too absurd not to be true, I think.

Last month, Briggs re-signed with the Bears for presumably a lot less than he could've made last off-season had he avoided that whole messy holdout situation. He would end up signing his franchise tender and all that eventually got him was a six-year, $36 million contract that includes $12 million in guaranteed dough.

After thinking it over, apparently, Briggs has decided that his new deal sucks. Seven weeks after he signed it. This must be some sort of record.

With the ink just dry on Lance Briggs' $36 million, six-year contract, he's been a no-show for the first two weeks of the voluntary workouts. That's cost him a $250,000 workout bonus included in the contract. (Urlacher is missing out on a smaller $50,000 workout bonus.) Briggs' absence is less easily explained. Sources outside the team suggest he could be unhappy with his deal.

Evidently, Briggs isn't all that psyched about the six-year, $42 million ($22 guaranteed) contract the Jets gave linebacker Calvin Pace, so he's doing what any certifiably insane person would do: hold out and lose $250,000 in the process.

Isn't Drew Rosenhaus Briggs' agent? What the hell has he been doing? Shouldn't somebody be scheduling a press conference to watch Briggs do shirtless sit-ups in his front yard or something?

Oh, and the news gets worse for the Bears: Robbie Gould is missing voluntary workouts too.

Hat tip: Pancake Blocks